Positive Mental Attitude has helped me gain confidence, gain friends and become happier as a result.
Some people that know me may find it difficult to believe that once upon a time I was chronically shy. I still get nervous sometimes and in certain situations but nothing like I used to. I still blush in many situations for the slightest reason which makes me anxious because its quite clear for all to see that I am feeling uncomfortable. I have always had ambition but this really held me back. I was scared to tell people my dreams, fear of failure and ridicule were huge. It was only in my mid twenties (quick titbit of info, I am now 29, but sshhh, don’t tell everyone!) after I had my first daughter that I began to think ‘Why am I bothered what strangers think of me?’ do their opinions really matter? Should my happiness really ride on these things?
My husband really helped with this too, he doesn’t care what people think of him, he is unashamedly himself and he has pushed and encouraged me in so many ways. Although there will always be a part of me that resists. The same goes for my stress levels. Back in college I was known as a ‘stress head’, everything was such a big deal, I was highly stung and defensive. But now I try to think ‘don’t stress about those things which you cannot control’, life is going to throw you some curve balls but how you react to them is going to alter the situation. If you choose to let things eat you up, if you bury your head in the sand that is not going to solve anything.
Of course Mrs Stress still likes to rear her ugly head but I now have ways of dealing with her.
One thing I have always believed and always try to pass on to others is having an optimistic outlook. This may seem irritating to others sometimes but which one of us is happier, the optimist or the pessimist? If you wake up and something happens and you think ‘oh its going to be one of those days’ it will turn out to be one of those days!! Whereas if you wake up and think ‘today is a good day’ or if something happens that’s not in the plan and you think ‘oh well never mind, no point stressing about it’ you will automatically feel much happier and the day will breeze by. Because you have handled it, because you have not let it dampen your spirit. This is positive mental attitude. It also links back to something called the law of attraction, definitely look it up because its so interesting. But basically what you think you attract. Think of yourself like a magnet, if you are a negative person you are going to attract all the negativity; negative thoughts, feelings, situations, even negative people. Your vibe attracts your tribe! However, if you’re a positive person you will do the opposite and attract all things positive.
Which brings me to my next point. Do not allow room in your life for negative people, those people that drain all the happiness from you, that suck your soul till you’re feeling dull and miserable. Those people that ‘dull your sparkle’ so to speak. That’s a total happiness killer. So don’t BE one of those people either! I try to only surround myself with people that make me happy, that respect my dreams, that have my back, the kind of people that are rooting for me, that say nice things, that are always supportive, that I trust 100% not to go behind my back and say things they wouldn’t say to me. They are the friends you need, even if you only have 2 or 3 friends like that, that is worth a million false friends.
Since changing my outlook on life, since trying to be a better person myself I have found I have attracted so much good in to my life, I feel happy because I appreciate everything that has come my way (Gratitude is a whole other blog post!). Positive mental attitude has brought me self-confidence (fake it till you make it baby!), it has brought me great friends and I am making new ones all the time, friends I would consider soul sisters, friends for life. By being pro-active and pushing myself through my confidence issues, I have my own business which is going from strength to strength, I am studying for a business degree, I am learning to drive and 2017 is going to be amazing! I will always have to work hard to appear to be a confident person, but I hope in time it will become less of an effort.
I would love for some of you to try changing your outlook, put a positive spin on everything, push yourself out of your comfort zone, smile at that stranger you see every morning on the way to work/school, speak to somebody you haven’t spoken to before, join a netmums group to meet new people. Give some of these a try and let me know how you get on and how you’re feeling after a week!